Folks
I'd like to sing a song about the American Dream
About me,
About you,
About the way our American hearts beat way down in the bottoms of our chests,
About that special feelting we get in the cockles of our hearts
Or maybe below the cockles,
Maybe in the sub cockle area,
Maybe in the liver,
Maybe in the kidneys,
Maybe even in the colon,
We don't know

I'm just a regular joe,
With a regular job.
I'm your average white,
Suburbanite slob.
I like football, and porno, and books about war.
I've got an average house,
With a nice hardwood floor.
My wife, and my job, my kids, and my car,
My feet on the table,
With a Cuban cigar.
But sometimes that just ain't enough,
To keep a man like me interested,
Oh no, no way, uh uhh.
No I gotta go out and have fun,
At someone elses expense,
Oh yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah,

I drive really slow,
In the ultra fast lane,
while people, behind me, are going insane.

I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, what an asshole)
I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, such an asshole)

I use public toilets,
And I piss on the seat,
I walk around in the summer time,
Sayin' "How about this heat?"

I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, what an asshole)
I'm an asshole
(he's the worlds biggest asshole)

Sometimes I park in handicapped spaces,
While handicapped People, make handicapped faces,

I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, what an asshole)
I'm an asshole
(he's a big [IMAGE]ing asshole)

Maybe I shouldnt be singing this song,
Ranting and raving and carring on,
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm wrong.
NAAAHHHHH

I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, what an asshole)
I'm an asshole
(he's the worlds biggest asshole)

You know what I'm gonna do?
I'm gonna get myself a 1967 Cadaliac Eldarado Convertable,
Hot Pink!
With whale skin hub caps,
An all leather cow interior,
And big brown baby seal eyes for headlights.
YEAH!
And I'm gonna drive around in that baby,
At 115 miles per hour,
Getting one mile per gallon,
Sucking down quarter pounder cheeseburgers from McDonalds in the old-fasioned non-biodegradable styrafoam containers.
And when I'm done sucking down those grease ball burgers,
I'm gonna wipe my mouth in the American flag,
And then I'm gonna toss the styrafoam containers right out the side,
And there ain't a God damn thing anybody can do about it,
You know why?
'Cause we got the bombs, that's why.
Two words, Nuclear [IMAGE]ing Weapons OK.
Russia, Germany, Romania,
They can have all the democracy they want.
They can have a big democracy cake,
Walk right through the middle of Tienemen Square,
And it won't make a lick of difference,
Because we got the bombs OK!
John Wayne's not dead,
He's frozen.
And as soon as we find a cure for cancer, we're gonna thaw out the duke.
And he's gonna be pretty pissed off,
You know why?
Have you ever taken a cold shower?
Well multiply that by 15 million times,
That's how pissed off the duke's gonna be.
I'm gonna get the duke,
And John Cassavetes,
And Lee Marvin
And Sam Peckinpah,
And a case of whiskey,
And drive down to Texas,
And,
(hey, Hey, You know you really are an asshole)
Why don't you shut up and sing the song pal,
You know the whole time I thought I was that asshole,
And it turns out it was him,
What an Asshole

I'm an asshole
(he's an asshole, what an asshole)
I'm an asshole
(he's the worlds biggest asshole)

A, SS, HO, LE
Everybody,
A, SS, HO, LE

I'm an asshole, and I'm Proud of it!

Ack, I'm too tired to read. Get a mic and sing it for me...NOW.

better yet, i'll give you a link:
http://www.halotv.net/html/modules.php?name=Web_Links&l_op=visit&lid=1

HALO! :Q
AHA! Nice! If you liked that you'll probably like this too.
Lord of the Rings: The Destruction of Halo

<-Extreme Halo Fanboy right here

<-so am i.

Wow old song.. not funny anymore..

quote:Originally posted by ?Wow old song.. not funny anymore..

Halo=sex.

Old song=SIR I DISLIK-UALHUAHLGULAGHGHAUAGAUGL

Stop singing Denis Leary. Though that song is the best song ever made, paramud has just killed the experience for me.

i just took a straight razor to my eyeball. no real reason.

Laaaaaaaaaaaaame.

GROVE UP !
TEXT FROM: DENIS LEARY - [IMAGE]HOLE

quote:Originally posted by SwazoExtreme Halo Fanboy right here


That makes me mad.

<-- Anti-Halo boy.

So you have some weakness after all.....

*Dramatic music flares*
It would seem that we have a disagreement here...
*Tumbleweed passes by*

more like:

"stupid semi-western sounding bugle call"
It would seem we have a fanboy catfight here...
"normal people pass by and laugh"