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Fellowship of t3h Ring
Soldat Forums - Misc - The Lounge
Ivan0
December 12, 2005, 7:01 pm
Some of you might have seen this, majority probably did not. LOTR CS-style; deplorable I know, but nontheless amusing.







[At Bilbo's 111th Birthday]
Merry: "Omg, I pwn"
Pippin: "Sif, I pwn"
**Rocket goes off
Gandalf: "Pwned!"

Bilbo: "This = shiz, bai foos"
Bilbo has left the server
Frodo: "***!?"

[later, in Bag End]
Gandalf: "Give teh ringz0r to Frodo"
Bilbo: "Sif! It r precious!"
Gandalf: "STFU NOOB!!!"
Bilbo: "ok"
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Bilbo has been kicked from The Shire

**Later
Gandalf: "Show me teh ring, foo!"
**Gandalf rides out, does some research, comes back
Gandalf: "OMGZ, it R teh ring!"
Frodo: "***?"
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Frodo has been kicked from The Shire
Sam has been kicked from The Shire

[At Isengard]
Gandalf: "sup dawg, i r g4nd4lf da gr3y!"
Saruman: "Foo! U R teh noob!"
Gandalf: "***?!"
Saruman: "Sauron pwns joo!"
Gandalf: "Sif, I R leet"
**Sarumon beats the **** out of Gandalf
Saruman: "Pwned!"

[on the road to Bree]
Merry: "look foos, shrooms!"
Pippin: "Woot! Shrooms!"
Frodo: "Ph34r!"
Sam: "Shrooms!"
Frodo: "PH34R!1!1"
**black rider stops, sniffs, goes past
Frodo: "OMG, packetloss!"

[Bree, in the Inn of the Prancing Pony]
**Frodo is drinking and dancing on a table, then slips
Frodo has left the server
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "OMGz, dc'd"
Aragorn: "OMG, noobz"

[at Weathertop]
Merry: "Mmm, shrooms!"
**MERRY IS BROADCASTING HIS IP ADDRESS!!!
Frodo: "Foos! Ph34r teh haxorz"

**the black riders attack
Merry: "OMG!!!"
Sam: "O.M.G!!!11"
Pippin: "***"
Frodo has left the server
**head nazgul stabs Frodo's ghost
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "***... hax!"
**Aragorn lraps into the fray with a flaming brand
Aragorn: "PH34r!!!!!!"
Merry: "LOLOL flamed! "

[on the road to Rivendell]
Aragorn: "ZOMG!Arwen!"
**Arwen rides up
Aragorn: "A/S/L? Wanna net secks?"
Arwen: "Sif! *** is up with Frodo?"
Sam: "teh leet Hax0r "
Arwen: "Firewall?"

**Arwen rides off with Frodo, the nazgul give chase. Arwen crosses
the ford at Rivendell.
Arwen: "PH34R!! My dad pwns urs!"
**nazgul start to cross
Arwen: "LOLOLOLO noobs!!1!"
**the ford rises up and washes the nazgul away
Warning: Connection Problems Detected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
Arwen: "Pwnt"

[at the Council of Elrond]
Gimli: "dwarves pwn!"
Legolas: "Sif, Elves pwn!"
Boromir: "OLOLOL noobs, men pwn!"
Elrond: "STFU tards!!1!"
**Frodo puts the ring on the plinth
Gimili: "Sif ring pwns all!"
**Gimli swings his axe at it, which shatters
Elrond: "**sigh, noob"

[Frodo meets up with Bilbo]
Bilbo: "OLOL, me = 10th level thief!"
Frodo: "OMG, u r teh pwn!"
Bilbo: "Do u still have teh ringz0r?"
**Frodo shows Bilbo the One Ring
Bilbo: "OMG u tard, I want to TK you!"
Frodo: "sif!"
Bilbo: "ph34r my mithril"

[The Fellowship leaves Rivendell]
**Gandalf leads the fellowship through the mountains
Legolas: "ZOMG, leet gfx!"
Gimli: "I R dropping frames! FFS"
**There's an avalanche which threatens to knock them off the shelf
Gimli: "Gandalf, teh draw distance is too far!1!!1"
Gandalf: "**Sigh. Moria?"
Gimli votes to change map to Moria
Votes 4 of 4 required
Legolas: "lolol Gimli, time to upgrade!"

[The fellowship approaches the gates of Moria]
Gandalf: "FFS, its too hard! Anyone got a walkthrough?"
**The gates of Mordor open, but the Guardian attacks!
Frodo: "OMG! ph34r!"
Boromir: "GL HF"
Aragorn [broadsword] guardian
Legolas [arrow] guardian
Gandalf: "gg"

[The fellowship enters the mines of Moria]
Gimli: "OMG!!!! PWNED!"

**After travelling some time in the dark the Fellowship come to a
chamber with a large well
Gandalf: "teh bookz0r has some clues!"
**Merry knocks a skeleton in armour down the well
Gandalf: "OMG! noob!"
Merry: "d'oh"
**The fellowship hears the ork drums
Boromir: "***?"
Aragorn: "***?"
Frodo: "..."
Gandalf: "Oh ffs >.<"
**the fellowhip shores up the doors as the orks come
Boromir: "TEAMS FFS!"
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Boromir [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
ork: "OMG! h4x!"
Gimli: "pwned"!
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas: "lol!!"
Boromir [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Gimli: "Foos!" Legolas [arrow] ork
ork: "ffs, wallhax!"
**The cavetroll enters the chambers destroying the doors
Gandalf: "Oh ffs!"
Boromir: "Omg, its teh boss!"
Aragorn: "Sif noob, we're not at teh end yet!"
**Cavetroll slams Boromir and Aragorn out of the way, and then
skewers Frodo
Sam: "OMG!"
Gandalf: "OMG!"
Aragorn: "omg, pwn!"
**Legolas jumps on the cavetroll and shoots arrows down into its
head
Legolas [arrow] cavetroll
Ork: "OMG! PWNED!"
Gimli: "LOLOOLOL! noobs"
**The fellowship then runs through Moria, chased the whole way by
a horde of orks
Boromir: "FFS! Teams, foos!"
**A flaming shadow starts to follow them, and the orks withdraw
Aragorn: "Now THIS is teh boss!"
Gandalf: "OMG!"
**The fellowship take to long flights of stairs that are starting
to crumble and fall. Orks shoot at them with arrows.
Legolas: "LOL, noobs. Chex0r this out!1!"
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
ork: "AIMBOT!"
ork: "turn it off!"
Legolas: "lolol!"
**The fellowship crosses a bridge, Gandalf stops to confront the
balrog
Gandalf: "joo shall not pass!"
Balrog: "***?"
Gandalf: "JOO SHALL NOT PASS!"
Balrog: "Sif, noob"
**Gandalf strikes the bridge with his staff, cracking it and
causing it to break under the Balrog's weight
Balrog: "ZOMG! PWNED!"
Frodo: "OMG! Gandalf!"
**The Balrog falls and in a last act of defiance strikes out with
its whip, entangling Gandalf
Gandalf: "D'oh"
Frodo: "OMG, joo foo!"
Gandalf: "fly u foos, fly!"
**Gandalf lets go and follows the Balrog into the crevass
Gandalf has left the server
Balrog has disconnected

[After escaping Moria the fellowship finds itself in Loth Lorien]
**The fellowship rests, and in the night Frodo speaks with
Galadriel
Galadriel: "For a noob, u r teh leet!"
Frodo: "Sif. I don't want teh ringz0r. Do u want teh ringz0r?"
Galadriel: "******! SIF I want teh ringz0r. I have enough h4x of
my own!1"

[The fellowship leaves Loth Lorien and sets out via river]
Saurman: "ph34r my army of uruk hai! Go outz0r, find teh hobbitz
and pwnz0r them!"
uruk hai: "leet!"

[stopping at the banks of the river, the Fellowship sets up camp]
**Frodo goes off looking for firewood, Boromir follows and
confronts him
Boromir: "Gimmie teh ringz0r so ** hax can fight teh boss!"
Frodo: "Sif, foo. Punkbuster will pwn joo!"
Boromir: "Naw, we play on non-pb servers"
Frodo: "STFU noob"
Frodo has left the server
Boromir: "***! FRODO! Bring teh ringz0r back, [CENSORED]hat!"

**A group of Uruk Hai encounter Boromir
Boromir: "OH FFS, TEAMS!!"
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Boromir: "****ing campers"
**Aragorn comes across the battle
Aragorn: "Boromir joo noob! ***!"
Uruk Hai: "Hah, pwn!"
Aragorn [broadsword] Uruk Hai
Aragorn: "I bring joo teh pwn!"
**Aragorn goes to Boromir
Boromir: "Damn lag!"
Warning: Connection problems detected
Boromir has disconnected
Aragorn: "FFS!"

[Frodo returns to the bank of the river where he gets into a boat.
Sam 'sees' him]
Sam: "Frodo! ***! Invisibility h4x!"
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "Sam, STFU and FOAD!"
Sam: "Sif!"
Frodo: "Oh, ffs n00b!"

3Nd!!!!11

Vijchtidoodah
December 12, 2005, 7:26 pm
-_-

AA's WWII version was so much better. NUTS!

Deleted User
December 12, 2005, 8:07 pm
That's [CENSORED].

peemonkey
December 12, 2005, 8:35 pm
god damn the inter net is stupid

Ivan0
December 13, 2005, 4:48 am
L0rd 0f teh Ringz0rz
Teh Tw0 T0werz

[Somewhere, under the mountains]
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf [Glamdring] Balrog
Gandalf: "U. R. PWNED!"

[Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas are running across Rohan]
Gimli: "FFS speed hax!"
Legolas: "LOL, N00b!"
**Aragorn spots the fallen broach
Aragorn: "Sif teh leaves of Lorien fall. They give +2!"

[At Isengard, Saruman is with a group of Wildmen of Dunland]
Saruman: "Teh Rohirrim are tards!"
Dunlander: "Sif leet! Damn retards!"
Saruman: "Joo bring teh pwn. Go and pwn those n00bs!"
Crowd of Dunlanders: "WOOT!"

[At Edoras]
**Eowyn visits the stricken Theodred in his chambers
Eowyn: "OMGOMGOMGOMG u got pwned! "

**Eowyn and Eomer go to Theoden-king
Eowyn: "Theodred just got pwnt!"
Grima: "Sif! Saruman is teh leet!"
Eomer: "Teh orkz0rs are pwning us! They wear Saruman's clag tag: {S}"
Grima: "FFS, Theoden is AFK."
Eomer: "Joo = Saurman's tard. And joo want netsecks with my sister, [CENSORED]!"
Grima: "Sif pwn me. I R Admin!"
Grima: "I r teh leet."
[Grima logs in as admin]
[Eomer is kicked from Edoras]

[Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas are running across Rohan still]
Gimli: "..."
Legolas: "FFS, Hide!"
Aragorn: "Sif! Hey foos, sup?"
Eomer: "WTF tard."
Eomer: "Clan {S} Are teh pwn in Rohan. Theoden has been hacked. WTF u doing here?"
Aragorn: "We r teh tracking teh Uruk-hai."
Eomer: "Teh Uruk-hai are teh dead."
Legolas: "OMG"
Aragorn: "And teh hobbits?"
Eomer: "Wtf is a hobbit?"

[Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas find the spot where the Rohirrim slew the Uruk-Hai]
**Aragorn kicks a helmet
Aragorn: "OMFGBSHAX, my toe! Arrrgh!"
Legolas: "Sigh. Tard."

**Aragorn searches, finds the ropes
Aragorn: "OMG, B&D!"
Legolas: "LOL, sif."
Aragorn: "And then they went into teh Fangorn forest."
Gimli: "WTF. GG FN tards."

[Merry and Pippin are running through Fangorn Forest]
Merry: "WTFBBQHAX"
Pippin: "Ssh."
Grishnákh: "Argh! Yuo=pwned!"
Treebeard: "Sif."
Treebeard [Stomps] Grishnákh
Treebeard: "PWNT!"
Pippin: "OMG"
Treebeard: "OMG, A/S/L."
Merry: "WTF?"
Treebeard: "U r teh orks"
Merry: "Sif"

**Smoke is seen to the south
Treebeard: "It r clan {S}. They R pwn."
Merry: "WTF is clan {S}?"
Treebeard: "Saruman@isengard.com"
Merry: "o.0"

**The hobbits can see a the armies of Isengard
Merry: "O. M. G."
Pippin: "Pfft, China inf is for noobs."
Merry: "N00b Zergling rush!!! o.0"
Treebeard: "Sif... got Entmoot, bbiab."
Merry: "Wtf is an Entmoot?"
Treebeard: "It R a LAN."

**Later, while the Ents are meeting
Treebeard: "Well, no war!."
Pippin: ">.< "
Merry: "o.0 SIf"
Treebeard: "Soz"
Merry: "Take us south."
Treebeard: "kk"

**Treebeard sees the desolation wrought by Saruman's armies on Fangorn Forest
Treebeard: "O... M... G..."
Treebeard: "FFS TARD MOFO >.< "
**Treebeard summons the other Ents
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
{S}Ork: "WTF1"
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Saruman: "OMG, I aven't finished my base defense yet! >.<"
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Ent [Treetrunk] {S}Ork
{S}Ork: "OMG! RUN AWAY!"
Ent: "PWN!"
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Ent [Stomps] {S}Ork
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Merry [Stones] {S}Ork
{S}Ork: "Ow, ffs"
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Ent [Stomps] {S}Ork
{S}Ork [Flames] Ent
Ent: "OMG OW!"
{S}Ork: "WOOOOT! ;P"
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
{S}Ork: "Aw!"
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
Treebeard [Stomps] {S}Ork
{S}Ork: "OMG BASECAMPER!"
{S}Ork: "FFS. >.<"
Ent [Rock] {S}Ork
Ent [Treetrunk] {S}Ork

**the Ents destroy the damn overlooking Isengard
{S}Ork is no more
{S}Ork is no more
{S}Ork is no more
{S}Ork is no more
{S}Ork is no more
{S}Ork is no more
Ent: "Woot!"
Saruman: "OMG. GG."

[Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas are in Fangorn Forest]
Legoals: "Teh White Wizard!"
Aragorn: "Ph34r!"
The White Wizard: "LOL, noobs."
Aragorn: "Wtf."
The White Wizard: "You want teh hobbits?"
Aragorn: "Where are they?"
The White Wizard: "LOL. They met teh pwnerer."
Aragorn: "Who are joo?"

**The white light fades, revealing Gandalf
Aragorn: "WTFOMGBSHAX!"
Gandalf: "Teh balrog was noob. He got pwned. I can dance all day, I can dance all day!"
Gandalf: "Boom! HEADSHOT!"
Gandalf: "I R GANDALF TEH GREY!"
Gandalf: "I R GANDALF TEH WHITE!"
Gimli: "FFS, make up your mind! ><"

[Eowyn is farewelling Theodred. Grima is there]
Eowyn: *tear
**Grima puts a hand on Eowyn's shoulder
Grima: "Sifn't deal with his pwnage, now that Eomer is banned"
Eowyn: "FFS tard, FOAD"

[Gandalf, Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas arrive in Edoras]
Gandalf: "There are tards here."
Gimli: "I'll TK all of them!"

[The four of them enter the Hall of Edoras]
Grima: "OMG, it's Gandalf. He is a tard!"
Gandalf: "Theoden, U R Tard."
Grima: [whispers] "Sif Gandalf"
Theoden: "FFS Gandalf, FU!"
Grima = [Admin] Grima
Grima: "Joo will be pwned!"
Gandalf: "LOL"
Grima is being kicked from the server. Reason: Using banned name "[Admin]"
Gandalf: "LOLOLOL"
Gimli: "Hah!"
Theoden/Saruman: "Joo have no hax here, Gandalf!"
Gandalf: "SIF!"
**Gandalf strikes Theoden in the head with his staff, driving Saruman's control from him.
Eowyn: "OMG!"
Gandalf: "LOL, Sifn't hax!"

[Theoden, Gandalf, Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas are in the Hall of Edoras]
Theoden: "Sif war. We would be pwned"
Gandalf: "Eomer is hax!"
Theoden: "We go to Helm's Deep, foo!"
Gandalf: "Sigh"
Aragorn: "WTF?"
Gandalf: "I'm off! I'll bring teh hax."
Gandalf has disconnected
Gandalf has left the server

[Grima and Saruman are in Orthanc]
Grima: "Theoden=tard. He'll go to Helm's Deep!"
Saruman: "o.0. Send teh warg-riders. They be pwn!"
Warg Riders: "Leet!"

[The Warg Riders attack the Rohirrim heading to Helm's Deep]
Warg Rider: "Argh!"
Hama: "OMFG!"
Warg Rider [Wargs] Hama
Gamling: "PWNT!"
Warg: "Grrrr!"
Gamling: "Nice doggie."
Warg [Wargs] Gamling
Gamling: FFS, lag
Warning, Connection problems detected
Gamling has disconnected from the server
Legolas [Arrow] Warg
Legolas [Knife] {S}Ork
Legolas: "Enemy Scout Spotted!"
Theoden: "FFS, teams! >< "
Legolas [Arrow] {S}Ork
Legolas [Arrow] {S}Ork
Legolas [Arrow] {S}Ork
Legolas: "LOLOLOL Tards!"
{S}Ork: "FFS, that hacker!"
Gimli: "I bring u pwn!"
Legolas [Arrow] {S}Ork
Gimli: "OMFG, kill theif!"
Gimili [Axe] Warg
**The Warg falls ontop of Gimli
Gimli: "FFS. BG"
**An Ork creeps over the corpse of the Warg.
Gimli [Judo chop] {S}Ork
**The Ork collapses on the warg.
Gimli: "Ouph!"
Rohirrim [Broadsword] {S}Ork
Rohirrim [Broadsword] {S}Ork
{S}Ork [Curved knife] Rohirrim
{S}Ork [Warg] Rohirrim
Theoden [Broadsword] Warg
Theoden: "Woot!"
{S}Ork [Warg] Rohirrim
Theoden [Broadsword] {S}Ork
Theoden: "LOLOLOL!"
{S}Ork: "FFS, hax!"
{S}Ork: "Turn it off!"
{S}Ork [Warg] Rohirrim
Theoden [Broadsword] {S}Ork
Theoden: "PWNED JOO!"
Aragorn: "LOL prepare to b pwnt!"
Sharku: "Sif, tard"
Sharku: "STFU and die!"
**Aragorn finds that his wrist is caught in the saddle straps of the Warg's saddles as it charges towards a cliff.
Aragorn [Stabs] Sharku
Warning: Connection Problems Detected
Warg has disconnected from the server
Legolas: "LOLOLOL, Pwned!"
Legolas: "Aragorn? FFS tard!"
Gimli: "Aragorn?"
Sharku: "LOLOLOLOLOLOL *cough"
Legolas: "WTF?! Sif live tard!"
Sharku: "He's dead!"
Legolas: "WTFBSHAX!"
Sharku is no more
Sharku has disconnected from the server

[At Isengard, Grima and Saruman are discussing the attack on Helm's Deep]
Saruman: "U can get hax for anything!"
Grima: "Wtf?"
Saruman: "I R leet. I've got teh wallhax for Helm's Deep!"
Grima: "Cool1"
**The armies of Uruk-Hai are arrayed out before Isendgard.
Saruman: "Leet hax0rs, go and pwn!"
Uruk-hai: "WOOT!"

[Aragorn has visions of Arwen, Elrond shows Arwen visions of he future, and Elrond and Galadriel discourse at length that the time for the Elves to leave is at hand]
Audience: *yawn.

[Aragorn is returning to Helm's Deep on the back of Brego. He sees the massive army of Isengard marching]
Aragorn: "OMFG. Teams! FFS!"

[Aragorn returns to Isengard]
Gimli: "HAX! LOLOOLOLOL"
Legolas: "WTF!"
**Legolas returns the Evenstar to Aragorn
Eowyn: *tear
Aragorn: "Sif safe. 10K {S} coming this way!"
Theoden: "OMG!"
Aragorn: "Teams!"
Theoden: "exec rohirrimhax.exe"

[Later, as Aragorn is preparing for the battle. Legolas and Gimli are there]
**A horn is sounded in the distance
Legolas: "Wtf?"
Legolas: "That is no {S} horn!"
Haldir: "Got Elf-hax?! "
Legolas: "Woot!"

[The Isengard Uruk-Hai array themselves before the walls of Isengard]
Uruk-Hai: "PWNAGE TIME!"
Gimli: "Sif! I can't see!"
Legolas: "LOLO. Shortarse!"
Aragorn: "exec arrowhax_v_1_2.exe"
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "Did they hit anything?"
Rohirrim [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
**The Uruk-Hai keep coming, and start raising ladders against the deeping wall.
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "LOLOLOL! TWO!"
Legolas: "Seventeen! Foo lol!"
Gimli: "OMFG"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas: "LOLOLOL!"
Uruk-Hai: "AIMBOT!"
Uruk-Hai: "Sif! I was behind cover!"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "17!"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "18!"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "19!"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli: "20! LOLOOL"

[The Uruk-Hai are stacking Saruman's devices into the culvert at the foot of the deeping wall. An Uruk-Hai comes running in carrying a specialised torch.]
Aragorn: "WTF is that?"
Gimli: "I can't see!"
Aragorn: "Kill teh tard!"
Legolas: "KK!"
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
**The Uruk-Hai stumbles the last few steps but manages to pitch himself into the culvert with the torch.
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Rohirrim
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Rohirrim
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Elf
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Rohirrim
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Elf
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Rohirrim
Uruk-Hai [Wallhax] Elf
Uruk-hai has killed a teammate
Uruk-Hai is no more
Uruk-Hai is no more
Uruk-Hai is no more
Theoden: "OMG! WALLHAX!"
Rohirrim: "Turn it off!"
Rohirrim: "Hackers!"
Uruk-Hai: "LOLOOLOLOL!"
**The Uruk-Hai start pouring through the breach in the wall
Gimli: "OMFG! TEAMS FFS!"
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Aragorn: "CHARGE!"
Elf [Sword] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Sword] Uruk-Hai
Gimli [Big [CENSORED]ing Axe] Uruk-Hai
Elf [Sword] Uruk-Hai
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
Elf: "OMG! TEAMS"
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
ELF: "FFS!"
Uruk-Hai [Rusty blunt sword] Elf
Legolas: "OMG"
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Arrow] Uruk-Hai
Legolas [Shield to the throat] Uruk-Hai
Uruk-Hai: "OMG BS!"
Aragorn: "Teams! FFS! FALL BACK!"
Uruk-Hai [Blunt vicious sword] Haldir
Uruk-Hai [Blunt vicious sword] Haldir
Haldir: "OMG. OW!"
Aragorn: "WTF BS HAX!"
Aragorn [Broadswoard] Uruk-Hai
Theoden: "Brace teh doorz0s!"

[The Rohirrim, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli are inside the keep]
Theoden: "OMG, we're pwnt!"
Aragorn: "Sif!"
**Theoden leads the charge out of the gates of Helm's Deep
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Uruk-Hai: "W. T. F?"
Uruk-Hai: "O M G!"
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrm [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim: "LEET!"

**To the East there is a rider on a white horse
Aragorn: "OMG! Gandalf!"
Gandalf: "FFS, teams!"
Eomer: "LOL sif!"

**The Rohirrim charge down on the Uruk-Hai on their flanks and front
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Rohirrim [Horse] Uruk-Hai
Uruk-Hai: "OMFG hax!"
Uruk-Hai: "!Changemap"
Theoden: "LOL, Rohirrim=teh winn0r!"

[Frodo and Sam are sleeping on the rocky ground]
Frodo: "Gandalfz0r!"
Sam: "WTF?"
Frodo: "..."
Sam: "STFU and sleep, foo!"

**Frodo and Sam head towards Mordor across rocky and inhospitible ground
Frodo: "OMG..."
Sam: "It's teh hax, isn't it?"
Frodo: "Chewing through teh processes. "
Sam: "Foo."

**That night, while Sam and Frodo sleep Gollum creeps up on them.
Gollum: "Sssif theives. Preciousss isss MY hax0rsss. We hatesss teh hobbitssses for leeching teh preciousss."
**As Gollum reaches out for the ring, Sam and Frodo jump up and grab him.
Gollum: "ARGH! FFS!"
Sam: "LOL, STFU!"
Gollum: "Sif, fatty!"
Frodo: "STFU Gollum"

[Later, after Emyn Muil and entering the Dead Marshes]
Frodo: "So... a/s/l?"
Gollum: "WTF?"
Frodo: "U r teh Smeagol"
Gollum: "OMG... smeagol... ... hax"

**A Nazgul flies overhead
Gollum: "OMG HIDE!"
Frodo: "wtf... lag!"
Gollum: "HIDE!"
Frodo: "OMG, LAGGING HARD!"
Sam: "HAX! Look at his ping!"
Gollum: "OMG"

[Later, Frodo, Sam and Gollum are overlooking the Black Gate]
Gollum: "Teh gate!"
Sam: "LOL, Sif get through that!"
Frodo: "FFS"
**The gate starts to open
Sam: "OMG, let's go!"
**A rock is dislodged and sent tumbling down the slope.
Frodo: "OMG, U R TARD!"
**Frodo throws his elven cloak over himself and Sam
Frodo: "LEET! Elvish invisibility hax!"

[Later on, Gollum is catching fish in a steam]
Sam: "OMG, fish hax!"
Gollum: "I R TEH LEET FISH0R!"

[Later that night]
Gollum: "Teh hax is mine!"
Smeagol: "No! It R teh masters!"
Gollum: "Sif tard! IT R MINE!"
Smeagol: "But Master is my friend!"
Gollum: "Sif Friends!"
Smeagol: "STFU!"
Gollum: "FOAD... u have no friends tard!"
Smeagol: "STFU STFU STFU!"
Gollum: "Cheat!"
**Smeagol is shaking his head
Gollum: "HAX0R!"
Smeagol: "STFU. Not listening!"
Gollum: "CAMPER!"
Smeagol: "Go away!"
Gollum: "Go away? LOLOOLOL, tard"
Smeagol: "U r teh hax0r "
Gollum: "U R leet cos of me!"
Smeagol: "SIF!"
Gollum: "WTF?"
Smeagol: "U R teh hax. Sif need joo!"
Gollum: "WTF?"
Smeagol: "FOAD foo!"
Gollum: "...sif!"
Smeagol has logged in as admin
Gollum is kicked from the server
Smeagol: "Wooot! "

[The next day]
Sam: "Po-tat-toes"
Gollum: "WTF?"

[Sam and Frodo see the Oliphaunts]
Sam: "OMG, teh oliphaunts!"
**Suddenly, pandemonium breaks out as the Oliphaunts come under attack
Frodo: "WTF?"
Sam: "OMG"
Farimir: "Wtf are you?"

[Frodo and Sam are taken to Henneth Annûn by Faramir and his men]
Faramir: "U r teh spiez0rz."
Sam: "Sif spies!"
Faramir: "Then who are joo, foo?!"
Frodo: "..."
Faramir: "FFS"
**Frodo tells Faramir about how they set out from Rivendell
Faramir: "U shared teh hax with Boromir?"
Frodo: "Sif.."
Faramir: "Boromir is dead"
Frodo: "WTF? How?"
Faramir: "Spawn campers ><"

[Mordor attacks Osgiliath]
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
Soldier's of Gondor: "OMFG! HAX!"
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
Soldier of Gondor: "STOP CAMPING FFS!"
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
{M}Ork [Broadsword] Soldier of Gondor
Soldier of Gondor: "Stay out of teh main!"

Farmir: "WTF?!"
Frodo: "Sif, I'm outta here!"
Faramir: "STFU!"
Sam: "OH FFS!"
Faramir: "KK!"

[The hobbits travel through the woods following Gollum outside of Osgiliath]
Gollum: "FFS... tard hobbits!"
Smeagol: "WTF... u haxing me again?"
Gollum: "Sif hobbits. Shelob!"
Smeagol: "WOOT!"

The Geologist
December 13, 2005, 5:10 am
Do you think anyone is gonna read all that crap?

TheFunktopus
December 13, 2005, 1:33 pm
Holy [CENSORED], I just bothered reading it to the part where Frodo gets the ring, it's [CENSORED]ing stupid/retarded.

mar77a
December 13, 2005, 6:15 pm
literature,geology.

Veritas
December 13, 2005, 6:53 pm
quote:Originally posted by The GeologistDo you think anyone is gonna read all that crap?


FOAD N00B, I PWND JOO!!1!11

Ivan0
December 13, 2005, 11:52 pm
Do you know what happens to little schoolgirls in japaneese cartoons?

Deleted User
December 14, 2005, 12:08 am
they get homework?

Ivan0
December 16, 2005, 5:34 am
They getWeebl'd & Bob'd: http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/hentai.htm

Melba
December 16, 2005, 2:47 pm
Even I can spot out the ancientness in this.

Deleted User
December 16, 2005, 3:21 pm
quote:Originally posted by Vijchtidoodah-_-

AA's WWII version was so much better. NUTS!


I think i heard of that one but i've never seen it. Link plz?

Edit: ah ive found it, or at least one like it. http://cf.rrstar.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=29&threadid=5438

TheFunktopus
December 16, 2005, 3:41 pm
quote:Originally posted by SDFilmquote:Originally posted by Vijchtidoodah-_-

AA's WWII version was so much better. NUTS!


I think i heard of that one but i've never seen it. Link plz?

Edit: ah ive found it, or at least one like it. http://cf.rrstar.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=29&threadid=5438


Yeah, that's the one.

Meandor
December 16, 2005, 4:11 pm
All these story conversions in wannabe noob talk don't even make me smile. There's no humor in them, just someone writing a crappy log randomly throwing in overused (and therefore NOT FUNNY) expressions. Even Cereal Reich was better.

karmazon
December 17, 2005, 12:40 am
quote:Originally posted by Meandor Even Cereal Reich was better.


no