-=The following is a general b!tch thread=-
all contained are issues that I should (and am) taking care of in real life (TFS). However, just as you talk to a friend when you need to vent, so I am doing now.


My girlfriend... is driving me... out... of my F*CKING mind. We've been together for over two years, and generally we've been a very stable couple.

However as of late things have changed significantly. We used to talk, laugh, giggle, flirt all that other good crap that couples do. I'm not talking about honeymoon stage [:-censored], I mean just generally being happy in one another's presence.

I'd call her on the phone and we'd (gasp) talk. Now it seems like I say whatever the current thing on my day was, and then sit in ackward silence for a few minutes while I look for an excuse to get off the phone.

I was over at her house tonight watching the new Lewis Black DVD. We said like two [:-censored]ing sentences to eachother.

I thought this crap wasn't supposed to start until after we were like... old and cenile.

And it's not that I'm not trying! I try to engage her in conversation and I get a bunch of one word answers. I ask her about her opinion on what she'd like to do, and it's always the same... "whatever you want" or "I don't care." When I'm around her it's like she'd just rather go to sleep or something...

What's worse is I'm sure she knows this is tearing me apart. I'm stressed out because of school. She used to be one of those few constants in my life, where I know I could talk to her and she'd be there. Now if I talk to her about my school problems I'm just met by the loudest [:-censored]ing silence on the other end.

*sigh*

umm...therapy?

hah dont get me started man..
Ive as of 1 year ago totaly given up on "girls" ie young ones.
too many headgames / guilt trips...

Well, if you didn't piss her off then maybe she just doesn't like you anymore?

Very possible. However after 2 years it's a bit of an adjustment coming to terms with that possibility.

she found another one and she doesnt know how to tell u this, sry man ;/

yes i think ThaD is right :\

treat her mean...and keep her keen.
i really dont think this works..
but apparently to seal a girls heart is to make her jealous..
personaly i wouldnt be risking trying this..but eh..
or just talk 2 her about it

In the name of all that is good I hope ThaD and ReDevil are wrong... but man.... at this point I just don't [:-censored]ing know...

tell her she's a noob

Smooth move SuperKill. My guess is that the name of your girlfriend is your right hand.

Social, couple of words from a specialist:
You never know whats going through their minds. I mean they have their own logic that is close to impossible to understand. Here is what may have happened:

1. You messed up somewhere and you dont realize it. That would be the most probable thing. Sit down and talk with her. Or take her out somewhere where you can talk. That should most likely solve your problem. I am sure that after being together for 2 years the least thing she wants to do is to keep you frustrated.

2. She started taking you for granted. After 2 years its easy. She thinks that you are going to be there by default, so she can treat you like sh1t. Stop calling her for a few days, sound disinterested. Show her that you are not a piece of furniture that gives her a ride to school.

3. Wondering about other options. She has been with you for 2 years. And she might be thinking she is missing out on something while spending all her time with you. Alot of ladies go through that period after 2-3 years into the relationship. This is a very tricky one, because its hard to tell what you should do. You can a. treat her with a cool, hoping she will get the message. And you run the risk of losing her. You can b. take her out on expensive date / trip and show how exciting you really are. But that may backfire as well. Or you can c. marry her, which is a radical approach. I mean if you really wanna keep her....

4. She wants to get more serious??? I dont know anything about your relationship, but since you are 19 years old, she might be thinking in terms of marriage/engagement.

5. Worst case scenario, she found somebody else. Try not to think about this one, because if its true, you will find out soon enough.

Anyway, i gotta get something to eat before i collapse on the floor. I hope i helped.

sigh..again bmf, you fantasize of actually having a life.

[IMAGE]

SP, stop wasting your time here and go with your girl. YES! GO NOW! You still here? GO! Each time you waste here could be used to improve your relation

GO SP, GO! talk to the girl, teel her that u love her, that u wanna be with her! do like palloco says! u can do it, man!

heck i need help just getting a girlfriend =/

quote:Originally posted by SuperKill
tell her she's a noob




HAHAHA!

i could give some good sound advice, but don't know just exactly how far you'd want to go in giving out personal details about your relationship. pm me if you want to talk.

1 link: [URL]

Social Poison wrote:
quote:And it's not that I'm not trying! I try to engage her in conversation and I get a bunch of one word answers.

I've never had a girlfriend, but this statement is close to my heart... except it's me giving the one word answers to my family.

quote:I ask her about her opinion on what she'd like to do, and it's always the same... "whatever you want" or "I don't care."

In fact she reminds me a lot of me ;)
Obviously, I am not her, but I can tell you about me and you can use/ignore my words as you wish.

First off, I don't get out much, so I have a lot of time to think. In my ponderings, the one issue almost always nagging me is the meaning of life. Is there an actual purpose? So far, I am lead to believe that there is no such purpose to life. This really got me down and thinking about suicide for a while, until I realised that there would be no more purpose in my death.
So, now I mostly go with the flow of life, hence the "Whatever"/"I don't mind" comments... I'll deal with whatever situation I end up in.

If there is one thing I yearn for though, it would be what I call 'duality'. To know someone so well, and work with them so efficiently that I barely need to talk to them to understand what they are trying to tell me. And this, I suspect, is a significant sub-concious factor in my short answers... to encourage people around me to watch me/observe me/learn me, so that they can understand me and know my answer before they ask the question.

social: i dont wanna be against you man, but the way your gf has been acting lately, shes proably bored of you, or she may have found someone else. convince her back to you, the best way you can.

Just wondering that... What comes out from name "Saana" - no matter what I love her anyhow (lol she had cutted a wound in her wrist) because she were so depressed luckily she is still alive
btw she did it before she met meh ;D

ok....

I know it sounds like [:-censored] & it's hard to believe in it, though it is true... *coz she got some sort of depression ilness dunno really she just told me about it & showed me her scar in her right wrist... :/

My g/f has "clinical" depression as well. I think this may be another reason for her mood as of late.

dammit cookie, i was gonna post that proof. POO ON YOU! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
well i guess i'll go back to proving 1=2, or 1=3, or 1=(any integer).

oh damn man..never date someone with depression....ugh..i found out the hard way..Ie not knowing about it untill ages...
and yes..she did also cut words into her wrists...one time..
[V]

There's a difference between depression and suicidal. My girl hasn't tried to really kill herself :P

how do you know its not coming but, you had better make sure she isnt think of it before you do anything really.

She sounds like shes bored....try soemthing new!!! :P
I dunno mabye she needs "space"

What do girls love the most? - sense of humour, believe me it works [8D]

hmmm
ill be serious for this serious topic :D
well, i pretty much agree with BMF on what he wrote u back there.
but there is another thing u should keep on mind: u have been with this girl since 2 years ago, u changed, she changed, thats the problem i guess... but u must know it better than i.
i myself cant think of someone my age (17) going out stady with a girl for 2 years, that would drive me crazy, since everytime u change, she and u need to get used to the changes, my longest relationship was 5-6 months, and i came to think that i would kill her if i dont get away.
i think u should take a vacation with her to some quiet place, where u 2 can chill out and lay on the beach all day, away from all the stress of school/army/work/home/city. i hope i helped u :D

people dont change

I totally agree with spitzfiya on this one, surprise the girl, buy her something or take her out somewhwere special, and smile at her as much as possible.or you could just talk to the girl, get everything out in the open.

lol weed get away from the army... :D

SP, judging from what u posted in your orignal statement, your girl cud be a little bored/depressed/ lots of things that cause people to act in really weird and abnormal ways. Then again, maybe she just doesnt like u anymore... are u serious about her? or have u considered new options aswell?

do YOU want to continue with her???

quote:Originally posted by Social Poison - 25 Oct 2003 : 01:05:10

My g/f has "clinical" depression as well. I think this may be another reason for her mood as of late.

Oh yeah, you need to talk with her 1on1 or then you can leave some free space - or i did when my g/f was depressed, I asked "why"... Then she told me that I am too active xD - & wanted some free time -now we are back on normal ^^;

you can say that everything is "back to normal"
but you know that a problem still exists.

Maybe so but we are having fun xP

BMF, that's idiotic. Of course people change. I've changed emmensily since my freshman year in HS [:P]

update, things are going a bit better now... I just think yea... depressed.

No you did not SP, you did not change immensely since you first year in high school. It is an illusion. Yes, you have a car now and a steady girlfriend. You go to school, you have a job, you have you formed opinions about everything. You may even have a moustache and hair on your chest; you have a different set of friends. You are a grown man.
Have you developed at all since your freshman year? Yes. Has your personality changed at all? No. You are the same old freshman Social Poison that you were 5 years ago. You just don?t realize it.

Modern psychology books say the personality stops developing at the age of 7-8. My personal opinion is that it happens even earlier. But my opinion does not matter, considering the extensive research that was don?t long before I was born. No, Social, people don?t change at all. People react to the environment, people adapt to changes, but they stay the same.
Have you opinions changed in the last five years? I certainly hope so. Do you possess greater knowledge about everyday issues? About drugs, sex, violence, wars, grocery shopping and telemarketing? Of course you do. Would you make a similar decision in an identical situation now and five years ago? You most certainly would. You are the same person Social, whether you admit it or not.

What I am saying is quite sad, but its the truth. You are born with a certain genetical background. You parents/guardians tweak it a bit in your early years (1-7). And then the development of your personality basically stops.
I look back at myself at the tender age of 7 when I first went to elementary school. It is scary Poison, but I did not change at all. I mean I have learned a lot, and I make better decisions, and I know a lot more, but I am the same person. Just like you are. Just like your girlfriend is. And she will probably never change.

When I was a kid I was always wondering where do all the stupid kids go? What happens to all the obnoxious, loud morons that I was surrounded with? As a kid I did not realize that adults can too be obnoxious, and loud, and stupid. And dim kids grow up to be dim adults.

I am not saying that the personality does not change at all. I am far too uneducated and inexperienced to make such a statement. It is quite possible that say a wife beater can go to a psychologist/support group/prison and never beats his wife again. But it does not mean he does not want to beat his wife. He just fights his personality out of fear to lose his wife/freedom. I am sure that chronic alcoholics stop drinking permanently. But the problem is that they want to drink, but they have to fight themselves constantly, because they how easy it is for them to go into an uncontrolled binge.

Anyway, I made my point. You can agree with it, or you can continue to live in denial. In any case one day you will understand what I am saying. I am sure you will, because I know you Poison, you are a smart kid.

PS I never say idiotic things unless I am flaming somebody. So if you think my post does not make sense, read it again. If you still feel it?s idiotic, you are wrong.

Well defended.

I suppse we'd have to put together a working definition about "who you are" before one can say whether or not you've changed.

I think that how you react to situations and what you've learned are part of what compromise who you are. But if you take it down to a stripped soul-like level, then I'd be inclined to agree with you.

Yeah, that's it. When you're a kid, you don't really know who or what you are, and then when you figure it out, you do things differently. So in a way, you change. The choices you make are different when you grow up. Certain aspects change. Basically you only exist as a person once you've gone through this stage, as before it, you just do crap with or without reason, like a drone, just making use of what you've learned through conditioning and reinforcement. This stage comes at different times for different people. And you can't just say 'Yup! That's the time when I became a person!', it happens over a period, then one day you realise you are who you are, and that you are indeed someone and something.

Another little update on the girlie girl thing. I took BMF's advice and stopped playing video games for an evening and went to see her (haha). We went and saw a movie (Seabuiskit was playing at a local theatre) and that was cool. But before and after the movie she was cuddely and all that other good stuff... so I'm thinkin' whatever the problem she was having has passed (or subsided at the least). Regardless, I feel a lot better about the whole thing.

Thanks for listening to me vent and what have you.

wow
nice theory there, i really would like it if it was true bout me, but as i said, its only a theory.

btw, im sure BMF have been waiting for a whole year for someone to write the short sentence : "people change"...

but thats what theories are for, to disscus them and see if ppl agree or disagree.

Sea Biscuit? How could an american in high school butcher that word so badly?

lol weed, i wasnt waiting for anything lol, it just happened

but yes, i had been thinking about that issue for a while now, like many other things

SP, i am really glad that everything turned out good. You see, you just had to take my advice =)

Just yesterday I thought about why I am/became the person I am now. I'm still the introverted guy that stands in the background and secretly thinks how stupid those fools are.
I don't know the fitting word for it, but it seems like I can't stand other humans.
I'm still someone who totally avoids the people he doesn't like. It's just as simple as that. "Why don't you go out and meet some friends?" - "hrmrmmm no. importannth on ttv... hmrmrm" .oO(I don't like those guys from my school)

Sorry for telling you that but the point is, I won't change. I remember that I behave like that since I'm.. what the hell, since kindergarten.

I'm glad for you SP.
and I agree with BMF about his post on page 2

.oO(Why don't they just SHUT UP)

It all depends on the weather I guess, or the phases of the moon, I don't seem to have any problems myself, that's because I happaen to also one of those ppl who stand in the backround not taking any credit for my achievements & thinking what fools they are all making of themselves.

I look for one where my own interests are so they don't get in my way.
still on the topic ofcourse.

I like how b00sta and Hiroshto start bragging out of nowhere. Good job guys.

Originally it was a thread about SP's girlfriend. But i am sure that everybody here would like to know how b00sta and Hiroshto feel about themselves.

TFS, i think its your turn to brag now.

wait you forgot me, i get to brag now

i believe im very similar b00sta, i dont "hate" other people, but i think id rather be alone than with people, but not all the time

I'm sorry I didn't mean to, I just wanted to point out that different ppl atract more different ppl.
If you know what I mean...

quote:Originally posted by wormdundee
wait you forgot me, i get to brag now

i believe im very similar b00sta, i dont "hate" other people, but i think id rather be alone than with people, but not all the time


Translation: I am a loser and no one will hang around me because I don't talk and I am generally afraid of people. Who needs them? I have my computer friends.

damn. im not sure if I have just done the right thing or not...
I was just up untill recently going out with a girl who was very demanding / moodswingy.

and i swear the crazy bitch kept going psycho at me for no reason saying that im dumped etc..
then coming back in the next 5 minz trying to be all nice....

well it happened a few times untill i thought fux that..
and did my own tantrum dump thingo..
exept she expects me to come crawling back now....

and at this point im thinking...i really cant be [:-censored]ed anymore dating....


jesus christ it is really annoying and heart wrenching and just crap...

I think that any dating under the age of 21 is just pathetic and worthless...oh and dont go on about how you and your gf / bf are really happy because you ARENT!!!!!

goddamn females and there stupid little headgames..

I quit..
looks like me and the old right hand will have to do for awhile....

Lol, you just got bad luck *coz dates can be real fun <-> in the evenings/night especially ^^ {Bed here I come!}

u tiger u :P

lol lumpy, mind games like that are annoying :/

Advice - stay outta that one :P (she's obviously not suited to you, at least at the moment)

lol, this cute girl on the bus (I catch a bus to university, too lazy to get a car) kept giving me the look... :P She then proceeded to stay on the bus as long as she could, but my stop was too far away from hers... lol so she got off at the stop before mine.
Had I not been heading straight for an exam... darn lol

[;)]

wow that could have turned into one of those kinky porno letters..

exept you would have had to be the bus driver...

and go "end of the line missy"

and she would be all like..."oh..im lost and all alone...how will i ever find my way home?"

*que porno music*

then you say "oh i have an idea baby"

then you go for the poon...the sweet sweet poon...

quote:Originally posted by Sharpshooter
quote:Originally posted by wormdundee
wait you forgot me, i get to brag now

i believe im very similar b00sta, i dont "hate" other people, but i think id rather be alone than with people, but not all the time


Translation: I am a loser and no one will hang around me because I don't talk and I am generally afraid of people. Who needs them? I have my computer friends.


Good idea, better go down on somebody who agrees with someone you ACTUALLY want to flame.

-Clan Leader
+ Server admin
Nice sig. Now be quiet.

BMF, I just agreed with your post and told you something about me. As you see I'm not the only one. Argh, and I made a point, so what the hell :)

quote:Originally posted by Sharpshooter
quote:Originally posted by wormdundee
wait you forgot me, i get to brag now

i believe im very similar b00sta, i dont "hate" other people, but i think id rather be alone than with people, but not all the time


Translation: I am a loser and no one will hang around me because I don't talk and I am generally afraid of people. Who needs them? I have my computer friends.


so apparently you like showing people that your a [:-censored]in retard, im not afraid of people, in fact im into acting and theatre sports, although i wouldnt expect you to know what those are

o yeh, i'm known as the person who never stops talking (almost) and i am friends with everyone in my grade

of course, the way your going right now, you'll probably make everythign i said into somehow proving that im a "loser" like you

so heres a thought for you, shut the [:-censored] up about what you dont know, apparently you seem to know everything about me, even though you dont know who i am, where i live, what i look like, what school i go to, who my friends are, and a million other things

o, and if you were smart you wouldnt reply to this with another flame post, since your dead wrong in what you said (o, and dont try to get back at me by pointing out grammar or spelling mistakes, thats just really sad, this is the internet, not a spelling bee)

Lol Lumpy, just dump the bitch. Never ever date people with mood swings, its the worst thing.

NC, if she gave you the look you should have at least come up and talk to her. But oh well..

BMF...

i did dump her..

and it was GREAT..hehe

GIRLS ARE BANE OF EVERYTHING!!! MY GF WAS CHEATING ME OMFG!!!
NOW I'M SO GOING TO LEAVE! bah with that girl!

2 years? holy crap, the longest ive been with a girl is 1 night, and it wasnt a relationship

and it wasnt a girl

Lol BMF, have you been spying?

ohh i just got some sweet revenge...sorta..

ok that girlfreind i was talking about before..

she rang up saying she was "sorry" COUGH COUGH...

and basically the response she got from me was.

If your more miserable with a girlfriend then without one..

then [:-censored] dating..

and then I cant beleive i said this. but..
"welcome to dumpsville baby..population you"
then i asked her if she had ever heard a truck reversing..and hung up...
ie *beep beep beep beep*

I am MAN! hear me ROAR!

lol but u dont get any of the good stuff when ure not

Lumpy you are an asshole, not a man. Men dont break up over the phone.

argh..after the [:-censored] i went through i should have dumped her over the
FAX LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lols

that is uber harsh

lol, BMF - in another 6 minutes, I was sitting in a room doing a 3 hour exam [;)]

3 hours?? What kinda exam is that lol?

I have Calc 3 and Statics on friday. Statics is a joke, but triple intergrals are kicking my ass.

lol @ triple integrals

i /piss on them

I hate maths always sucked at it, even stats :(
Anyway come and sit my Law exam :S

Law exam? uni guy.... sorry mr. im smarter than all of you

Its only company law, im not doing a Law course, but it is a core subject.
its a hoe of a sublect cos u have 2 remeber like 50 cases and specific details about each 1 :S
I probably am smarter than u. All New Zelanders do at school is learn how 2 be Aussies :P

Statics is not statistics. It is physics of stationary structures

hahah u wish deaf aussies are chimps and need the flow of NZers to australia to tame them and add some intelligence to their gene pool